No Intimacy In Marriage

Hello, my name is Jon, my wife and I have been together for 5 years, married for 4. We were both divorced before and probably had trust issues from past. I am crazy in love with my wife, she is my world but there is no intimacy in marriage, intimate hugging barely do I get a peck on the cheek.

I have tried talking to her about the issue with no success, she says she will work on it but never does. She had a full hysterectomy so I understand she has no drive, but you would think she would care about her husbands intimacy needs and suffering as I don’t want to cheat but feel trapped. I’ve told her I’m miserable and she said it’s my problem to deal with as she is content with it.

I’ve tried taking her on date nights but she blows that off unless we bring the kids along, her entire focus is the kids in the relationship. She has 2 girls and a son brought to the marriage, I have a son from previous marriage who is out of the house. I don’t even try to initiate anymore because I know its no use. I’m miserable and desperate, lonely and love her with all my heart. She seems to love me but it’s confusing the way she treats me, she says im being selfish, am I wrong to be angry?

I’m at a loss for options to try and improve our marriage. I’m probably dump now after all the time going without intimacy or any emotional connection with the woman I madly love. I’ve suggested couples counseling but she says I should go by myself as its my problem and not hers. Any advice is appreciated or ways to talk to her, or is divorce my only option and healing to find someone who will be the partner I deserve and want.

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2 Responses so far.

  1. Bright Bethwel says:

    Your marriage is likely to collapse anytime soon.
    Intimacy is one thing that keeps marrigae together. Without it, the strength of your marriage Is weakened.
    It’s good you have tried every means to tell your wife how you feel. Done everything possible to get her to change.
    I suggest you file for a divorce rather than being in this and not be happy.
    All the best.

  2. Tijani says:

    Control your feelings, pretend not to have problem with what shes doing, she will feel it and trust me she will bring herself, just pretend to be fed up wit the intimacy or whatever shes putting you through, she will feel guilty of her actions and will try to make things right.


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