How to Deal With Breakups
No matter the duration of a relationship, amidst the odds faced…., the break in a relationship can be an awful and quite painful experience. It leaves one feeling rejected, lost and empty when its impact strikes unnoticed. During this period, there’s the need to strengthen one’s self physically and emotionally so as to be able to rise above such a limitation. A break in a relationship is likely to have much serious impact, if the relationship with your partner was that serious and so future driven or focused. The more attached you were, the greater the hurt experienced. Lifting yourself up after a break is not at all a rosy affair, but a must do for you if you really desire to move on and develop yourself mentally, emotionally and physically. Whether the break is coming from you or initiated by your partner, dealing with breakups is very important as well as finding ways and means in getting back the life you once lived before the break. Helping you make it through that period of uncertainty, we’ve listed out some few tips in how to deal with breakups:
- After a break in a relationship, the most important point in revitalizing yourself and working on your whole physical and emotional side, is to allow yourself go through the total process of grieving, feeling pain and letting out your emotions concerning the break. Refusing to accept the fact that you’re hurting and going through a tough time doesn’t do much to salvage the situation, as you tend to feed yourself with much stress, total frustration and finally sinking down into an inevitable state of depression. Often at times in a breakup, variant forms of emotions are experienced ranging from…feeling sad, hatred, bitterness, rejected and a total vacuum of emptiness created plus loneliness emanating from within. It leaves you in that spot where you feel lost, left out and have no direction whatsoever towards the future. Some people even go to the extreme of having rare effects of losing their own personalities after a break in a relationship, owing to the fact that they might have given their all in all to the other person thereby making it impossible to move on without having them by their side.
- Another way to deal with breakups is to stop feeling sorry for yourself! We all know and accept the fact that Breakups are undoubtedly painful experiences, but you can’t let them take over your life completely now can you? You need to identify the Cause of the break not as being your fault but being an inevitable circumstance that occurred between you and your partner. You feeling sorry for yourself does not guarantee your partner or relationship bouncing back to its feet. Face up to the challenge and get over the break. Life must continue! It’s just a relationship going down the drain; it’s not your life breaking into thousands of pieces.
- In dealing with a breakup, you have to make it a point to destroy your past. It’s a key practice everyone needs to adopt if they really want to deal with the break. Any and everything that reminds you of that ex should be loosened. Just let go off all those memories that reminds you of them. You do yourself more harm by holding on to the dreams and memories of them returning one day to you. It might happen, but don’t place your hopes on it. Forgetting about the past is part of the moving on process and when you tend to carry all of that excess baggage of your ex or past with you, you might not make it far in the moving on process. Constantly keeping reminders that prompt you about the existence of your ex will just leave you feeling empty and hollow on the inside.mmm….Not so good a feeling to have!
- Your Ego is the next thing to consider when dealing with a breakup. This can be attributed to the fact that it has been badly damaged or fractured due to the hurt felt out of the rejection from losing a partner. Now, getting back up and reinstating yourself to face the dating world again can be challenging but not impossible. To gain one’s self confidence back, there’s the need to work on yourself physically and mentally. This could come in the form of going out to meet and mingle with new people, partaking in fun stuff or activities that help a long way towards boosting your state of mind and ego in general. Hate it or love it, you need to step up your game and get back on track to dating once more.
- Remind yourself of all the good and positive things you possess. Losing someone you love does not suggest in any way the loss of one’s life completely. You may be facing or experiencing a sudden loss of one part of you. It may be…., your partner, your future plans and dreams together, your relationship among other things. There’s that very strong tendency of placing much more attention on the ills that accompanied the break instead of focusing on the positive side of things yet to come. Being optimistic about life and having a wider view of the way forward after a break is the best you can do personally in stepping out of that rejection and self-pity zone.
No one ever said going through a break in a relationship is going to be easy. In fact, it’s about the hardest and most emotionally wrecking periods in the life of one. It’s that time when you begin to see and view things in a different light which could leave either positive or negative effects in your life. But amidst all this, you need to rise above the circumstances and challenge yourself! There’s no need crying over spilled milk now is there? Absolutely not! In recognition of this fact, I think it’s time for you to step out of that shell and begin to recognize in the fact that you are a definition of what you portray to the outside world in general. Break ups can’t make or unmake you. You are bigger than that and far more fabulous to be beaten down. Tell yourself that each and every step of the way. You can overcome it …; it’s possible to deal with it!
How To Deal With Breakups was Written By: Chantelle Iris Nunoo.