Why Do Married Men Cheat

One would assume a man’s decision to marry is because they’ve found a woman they’re happy with. So then one would ask why do married men cheat in marriage even though they happen to be with the woman they claim to love so dearly?

Infidelity in marriage is one activity which destroys the life of most ‘once-happy’ marriages, tearing them apart and leaving partners awfully devastated at the end of the day.  Married men cheat in many forms and a woman may either deem it fit to conclude that an action done by the husband constitutes cheating or not. In simple terms, cheating in general can be defined quite differently from person to person. For instance, a wife catching her husband in a ‘pecky’ mood with another woman, may not be termed as that partner cheating or that particular act to the other partner may not necessarily be that vital to be considered as a cheating case. Owing to this, cheating has been categorized into two main types. These are: the emotional kind of cheating and the physical kind of cheating.

We all may be quite comfortable with the Physical cheating ’, coming from the fact that, that is what we’ve become accustomed to and deem fit as being classified as cheating in general terms….i.e.; activities ranging from physical intimacy down to kissing, hugging, smooching and the final showdown, sexual intercourse. But this isn’t entirely the case. The emotional aspect of cheating involves one partner becoming alert and conscious of the emotions and feelings of another person outside the marriage other than his/her marital partner and most often than not tends to be more caring and affectionate or somewhat loving of that person leading to the ignoring of the real or legitimate marital partners emotions. This can be so painful to bear and most couples experience feuds and petty quarrels very often when they get to learn this about the other partner doing the cheating. This form of cheating can slowly and gradually progress from the barest stages of care, show of affection, but most dangerous of all, could lead to the generation of physical attraction between a partner and the other person.

Married men usually are more prone to cheating in marriages according to relationship experts and researchers view point. This inference drawn mainly stems from the fact that married men are humans who are much driven by the visual quality or beauty of the things they see around them. In other words, they generally are people who admire what they see physically and most often get bored with having to see or be with one thing for over a long period of time without having to change. Variety some may choose to call it, is what they feel for most of the times their in relationships. This tends to most of the time direct their attention towards seeking other things aside what they already have and decided upon to keep or be with till death do them part…..a.k.a marriage.

Cheating or infidelity in marriage can be defined in simple terms as the breaking or violation of a marriage vow or contract through emotional or sexual activities which end up affecting the other partner whose at the receiving end. Most wifes often think that there isn’t really any good enough reasons why husbands decide to cheat, but I can tell you for a fact today that nobody does anything for just doing sake. There’s always a reason as to why it’s being done, but the married wife sitting on the fence may not really be inclined in getting to understand why these actions are mostly done. A married man may have all that he will ever need in a wife or even dream of, in terms of qualities but may still go out in search of other relationships. Outsiders may not get the whole idea behind this act and may be quick enough in judging. Cheating while one is in a marital relationship, is an entire sin on its own when you come to the biblical aspect and no reason whatsoever can justify this act, but however, we would like to delve a little into why married men would want to cheat in their marriages…just so we get to know why they do and if really their reasons are worth the whole hurtful process they put women or their wives through. Now, researchers have come out to say that men who usually cheat decide to base on the following reasons….

Why Married Men Cheat: Emotional reasons:

Married Men Cheat because of Fear

Married men who usually have been through or suffered some form of emotional trauma during their developing stages in life, tend to cheat in their relationships quite often or are prone to cheating when they get attaché with someone else. This is due to the fact that, the emotional trauma or injuries suffered during those periods may not have been totally nurtured or nursed to go away, but have been made to stay and continually stays with that person over a long period of time. When they get to that stage where they begin to engage themselves in relationships, they tend to backslide owing to the hurt experienced those past times as children or adolescents. They become very withdrawn emotionally, fear intimacy with their partners, fear commitment and generally wouldn’t want to place themselves out there to be loved by their spouses. In order to seek inner peace, they turn to the act of cheating or looking elsewhere for things that’ll rarely satisfy them.

Married Men Cheat because of Loneliness

The feeling of being lonely when one is involved in a marriage and the expectation of the other partner being there to keep them company could lead most men into cheating in their marriages. The awkward feeling of not getting that much sought after attention from ones wife, may push a man into looking elsewhere for that affection of another who can fill the emptiness inside of him. The man usually feels he has no connection whatsoever with his wife and this creates some sort of emptiness or vacuum, which the man will move heaven and earth in trying to fill. A lot, to the man, seems to be missing in the marriage and the only possible way sought out to them is by cheating.

Married Men Cheat because of Anger

A man who’s filled with so much rage, anger and bitterness within him is most likely to cheat in his marriage. This stems from the fact that, the actions of a wife, may draw a man into feeling somehow desperate and overly angry about ever deciding to marry them in the first place. It could be minute faults coming from the side of the woman, but is mostly seeing as something quite hurtful or irritating by the man of which he would most often like to keep within himself but in reciprocating, cheat on his wife so as to make himself feel better. Consider it as a way of a man being vengeful towards his wife for apparently trivial reasons of which may not even be known to the woman at the end of the day. The guy may pretend to be happy in the marriage, but deep down within him, he’s mad at you for not cooking his meal just because you got home late the other night, or because you forgot to wash his favorite shirt while doing the laundry the other day….., which is so less important, but he considers all this as being very dear to him and once you could forget these, he builds up some sort of resentment deep within him and fires back at you by going after someone he thinks would not forget to do all those.


Why Do Married Men Cheat? Physical Reasons

First Answer is Lack of Sex in Marriage: 

Sex is an all important aspect in the life of every marriage. It is the main constituting factor that leads a man leaving all other women and deciding to stay by just one particular woman known as his wife. Now, if he demands for sex and is being denied all the time, where does that place him in the marriage? He feels somehow chocked and frustrated as he’s being starved sexually. This whole negative feeling of being rejected by ones wife sexually or denied sexual privileges encourages and leads to the adoption of cheating in order to gain that satisfaction being denied in the bedroom outside the marriage. So if you’re a woman and denying your husband sex, just save up for couples therapy exercises in future.

Lack of physical connection with partner:

Usually, a married man and his wife are supposed to bond wherever it is they find themselves as two compatible people. When there arises that feeling where a man does not really get to feel that connection or bond between him and his wife, he may be tempted to step out into finding just the right lady who would bond with him in so many ways possible. For instance: it could be that a man feels he’s not in any form of connection with his wife when it comes to the sex part of their marriage. They may have dozen bouts of sexually adventurous activities, but the man may not be too enthused with the whole act and may feel disconnected from the woman even as they engage in so such intimate moments. The desire and urge to go out there, seeking one who would bond with them becomes the order of the day and nothing no one says can stop or hinder their decision to cheat in the marriage.

Fractured or wounded ego

Men do not play with their egos at all and hold them in high esteem, especially when they find themselves with the opposite sex. Are you a controlling wife? Very soon there will be no husband to control. Men are people who like to be in control in their marriages and would never appreciate women trying to switch places with them in the marriage. It’s an ego thing really and it makes them feel good, places them in control in the relationship and often gets them going positive in the relationship. Due to this, they would never accept any woman who would walk into their lives or one they’re married to, to trample upon that position or disrespect their authority in the marriage. If a wife decides to show all her repulsive attitude that kills a man’s ego, he will in turn direct his attention outside, to other places where he would feel very much appreciated and respected so to speak. He would not want to be around a wife who’s bossy and does not allow him assume his position as lord of the house. He would prefer a ‘humble’ woman, thus leading to his cheating on his wife.

Conclusion on Why Married Men Cheat

Cheating is an act that’s nurtured and borne by one personally. Nothing can really justify why people do it, but others may say they were pushed into doing it most of the time in marriages. Whatever leads a man into cheating on his wife in a marriage setting is a decision entirely on the man’s part to…., his wife’s actions or inactions play no part in his decisions. This is to mean that, one may decide to cheat or not to even if their spouses are a hundred percent faultless or blameless of the cheating emanating In the first place. A wife’s flaws cannot be used as a surety for cheating in a marriage. No matter what she does, if you bent down on cheating on her, you still will anyways. It doesn’t matter how perfect or faulty she is, at the end of the day, it all balls down to a man’s thoughts and actions of deciding to cheat if he really wants to. If you find that perfect person in your life, and you know they’re made just for you…., do not be crazy enough to let them go by cheating on them. Once their gone, they may never come back.

Why Do Married Men Cheat was written by: Chantelle Iris Nunoo.

2 Responses so far.

  1. priness says:

    Men definitely have reasons for cheating though others might have a tangible reason which with that is even questionable. Everybody has a reason for an action just that most are not bold to tell us. Sometimes we the ladies are to be blamed for their actions. Sometimes too not our fault. But what I can say to the ladies out there is:keep on doing what made him love you in the first place. Do not stop because someone out there is ready to do anything just to have him.